HEY everyone! I was on vacation and since this column is just a random bit of fun on this website...you would never have known..because I'm not a legit reviewer..this is more my ramblings over email that I laugh at in between playing Lexulous online...wait...BUT I'M BACK..and totally down with a list of crap you should watch...because I said so...no other reason...here we go...

 

STAR TREK-turns out this movie is everything I have ever wanted in a movie and I am completely shocked and teary-eyed about it. Pretty cool that there's action, sex, love and stupidity in it..because I prefer all of those things in a Lifetime movie so why not Star Trek?

 

Just for the record, I loved Chris Pine waaay before he became who is he now and even though he is rumored to be nailing Audrina Patridge of The Hills, I still love him. He is everything and more in this film and believe it or not, HE IS THE REPLACEMENT ACTOR.

 

Matt Damon, whom I previously stalked in my past, was supposed to take the roll and he passed on it!

 

Star Trek is super cool because you don't have to be a Trekkie to follow it or dig it..but so help me God, I walked out a Trekkie.

 

Not that I would publicly admit that or anything.

 

YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS MOVIE.

 

ANGELS AND DEMONS-I haven't seen this yet but I have decided when I have four hours to spare, it's first on my list. Unless I am near the batting cages in Wrigleyville, then I make no promises. But this movie looks good...I heart Tom Hanks, I dig the storyline..I have read and seen The Da Vinci Code and I like a good religious movie for some crazy reason.

 

I'm really curious to see how they tie this one up..and if it will turn into a trilogy of some sort because clearly, it never ends.

 

I am also curious to see how people feel about this film in addition to Tom Hanks as an actor in general. This has made such an impact on his career that I wanna say he is sure to have lost some followers..no pun intended.

 

Who doesn't love controversy? Aside from the song, I do!

 

I will definitely give an in depth on this film but I really have to pump myself up to see it..we are talking large slurpee action here.

 

GHOSTS OF GIRLFRIENDS PAST-I hate dissing the people I love but this is really sad. I wouldn't even watch this film on Lifetime and you know how much I love Lifetime.

 

Poor poor Jennifer Garner. I really like her a lot..most people don't. The whole Elektra thing upset everyone and now all of sudden noone wants to watch a chick who acts like a Superhero and married Daredevil.

 

This one is obviously about the people that you date and ditch..we have all dated someone and then mmmmaaaayyybbbee realized we might've jumped the gun on ditching em.

 

Ahhh memory lane, I dated this guy who had two incidents with me that I felt odd about..one, his credit card and another time he offered me an "adult beverage". He was soooo great though...sooooo great. He sent me on a scavenger hunt which led to ice cream. Just an all around awesome guy.

 

That's the one that got away. That's my ghost of boyfriends past.

 

Wow, that is so sad. I am praying he never looks me up and sees this....PRAYING.

 

COMING SOON

 

MANAGEMENT-This movie had Steve Zahn and Jennifer Aniston in it...I really feel plagued by Jen..first the John Mayer thing now this..I don't know. It's almost magnetic. It scares me. Wait, let's come back to Coming soon movies...I have something to admit...

 

COME AND GONE..BUT I KEEP GOING BACK FOR MORE...

 

17 AGAIN-I am only gonna say this once, I may have a crush on Zac Efron.

 

OBSESSED-Once again, I want to mention that this movie is a trip..only because it's Beyonce. Again, I'm on the edge of looking for someone with an attitude to test me. I'm not sayin'..I'm, just sayin....

 

ON DVD-

 

BABY ON BOARD-Very rarely does anything strike me where just the sight of it makes me laugh outloud but I decided to share that nonsense with you and go a step further with this DVD pick.

 

I personally have never taken Heather Graham seriously as an actor and maybe that's just me but if you have ever seen Boogie Nights..man, you can't come back from that limo scene. Ever.

 

This movie is about a chick who gets knocked up. I know, original. If you haven't started laughing yet..guess who is in it? Lara Flynn Boyle.

 

Coincidentally, this movie went straight to DVD...will I see it?

 

Duh. Of course I will.

 

CADILLAC RECORDS-Uh, did anyone even see this? I had to ask that because I remember hearing about it but did not know it had ALREADY come and gone...vroom. ZING.

 

So I was home this past weekend and our family pick was this movie because my dad digs it..he never rolls anywhere without his "Best of Motown" cd that him and my mom insists on blaring wherever we go..while they yell conversation to eachother blatantly ignoring that they could just turn it down..for our sake and the sake of my youngest niece's hearing...but whatever..if not for their indiscretions, I would not be here...

 

So, I was all jazzed about it and trying my damndest to be excited about family time..but here's where this review goes sour..

 

because the last thing I remember was laying my head down on the couch after I shoveled a bite of my sour pickle in my mouth..

 

I fell asleep.

 

I have absolutely nothing to tell you about this film.

 

ON TO THE NEXT!

 

COMING SOON, AGAIN..

 

DRAG ME TO HELL-I was just telling my cohorts about my unusual desire to see this film..reason being because I happen to have a thing for Allison Lohman. Ever since Matchstick Men, I have been all up in her grill and can't seem to say no to her. I like her mouth and as sexual as that sounds, it's not. I just like her. She was in White Oleander too with Michelle Pheiffer..liked her in that also..I don't know what it is..but I just freakin' like her.

 

This one looks scary..but I will say I am kinda nervous that the previews gave it all away..she gets cursed by a lady who she earlier denied for a loan extension and then all "hell" breaks lose..zing. Plus, it's directed by Sam Raimi and I like that guy a lot.

 

Justin Long is also in this...and I never really stopped to check that guy out so I am excited to see what he has to offer.

 

I did know that Ellen Page was originally cast to play this role but dropped it after she got super popular with that lil film she was in...whateves...

 

LAND OF THE LOST-Naturally, anything with Will Ferrell is gonna rule in my book (f-u, drex) and not only does he make me laugh but BRING ON THE DANNY MCBRIDE!

 

Loved McBride in Pineapple Express..wanted more of him..he is just so strange you can't help but laugh.

 

I'm apprehensive, sure..like when I saw Blades of Glory for the first time...desirable? Notsomuch..did I love it the fourth, fifth time I saw it? HELL YES.

 

Plus, Dinosaurs are cool. We so rarely see them. Anymore. Yep. I just said that.

 

 

You're effin' OUT. I'M effing IN.